49 Comments
User's avatar
Ian David's avatar

Bob Cunis must be a lock for the NZ team, particularly given his insipid statistics as an all rounder.

Chris's avatar

"Funny name, Cunis - it's neither one thing nor the other." - John Arlott

CJ's avatar

The greatest of Arlott quotes amongst many

Cricket et al's avatar

Was actually Alan Gibson. But worthy of Arlott!

Donnish's avatar

Great stuff. ‘Spofforth’ appeals to me as onomatopoeically descriptive of an MCC stuffed shirt spitting out his cucumber sandwich as the Demon rattles the pickets behind the keeper.

Cricket et al's avatar

He was definitely adjacent.

Amanda Buckley's avatar

Let’s have your Windies list as well, please. Try to include Eldine Baptiste.

Cricket et al's avatar

Right-o. Eldine is a great start.

Greg Hardy's avatar

Good call. The Windies would have the most colourful and imaginative names of all. Snuffy, Vibart, Foffie, Elquemedo and Clairmonte as well as Eldine among many. Some of them sound like exotic nicknames (maybe they are?)

Cricket et al's avatar

Greg, I think you're sent me a direct message but I've no idea how that function works, so feel free to drop me a line at my email address: gideonhaigh@hotmail.com. I know how email works!

Greg Hardy's avatar

Thanks Gideon. Just sent it

pete's avatar

And I love using Wally Grout as rhyming slang for "your shout!"

Cricket et al's avatar

Thus the title of Wally Wright's book: It's Your Wally Grout.

Aditya Roy's avatar

Xavier Doherty

Luke Pomersbach

Ben Hilfenhaus

Gary Gilmour

Michael Kasprowicz

These are some unique sounding names

Cricket et al's avatar

Good areas, although Gary Gilmour not unique: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gary_Gilmore!

Cricket et al's avatar

Great song. On my playlist already.

Aditya Roy's avatar

And you got to have Marnus, Scotty Boland

Mickey Randall's avatar

The vegetative Graham Onions makes the England side. Great article.

Nathaniel Ramm's avatar

“Jackson Munro Bird the third” is living rent-free in my head on repeat.

Wally Mason's avatar

Who doesn’t love a Wally, indeed.

Chris's avatar

"Including Kepler, though, means I can’t in all conscience find a place for Marnus Labuschagne - two South African flourishes would be one too many."

Gideon, your uneasiness brings to mind Edmund Blackadder's Puritan aunt, Lady Whiteadder: "Chairs? You have chairs in your house? Wicked child! In our house, Nathaniel sits on a spike and I sit on Nathaniel - two spikes would be an extravagance!"

Cricket perhaps more than any other sport has allowed distinctive names to roll around in the mind. Perhaps it is part of the sport's ingrained class consciousness? As a football writer once claimed, Pelé

(who actually detested his own infantile moniker) would have been very differently appreciated had he been a cricketer and known as E.A. do Nascimento.

Lenny Pascoe would have been perceived rather differently had he been known by his birth name, Leonard Durtanovich. And L. O'B. "Chuck" Fleetwood-Smith matched the name brief with an outstanding interwar raffish look and life story.

Cricket et al's avatar

Not too many hyphens in Aussie ranks, that's for sure. All the more reason to cherish JFG.

Chuck's avatar

You'd approve of Rick Darling then?

Cricket et al's avatar

We interviewed him on the podcast!

Pete B's avatar

I always liked Ishant Sharma. You can just find and replace him right into Lennon's song, "Ishant Sharma's gonna get you" etc.

Pete B's avatar

As Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds is Lalor/Haigh approved, how appropriate it is that Conway Savage is actually Conway Savage's real name. Vale Conway. Speaking of Conway, his niece Cash Savage is in an excellent band, Cash Savage and the Last Drinks. Check out their song $600 Short On The Rent.

Peter Lalor's avatar

I didn’t know about Cash was his niece, will check her out.

Max Bonnell's avatar

There are some disappointed Ted a'Beckett fans out there...

Max Bonnell's avatar

And I suppose we now have to add Mahli Beardman...

Cricket et al's avatar

I liked that Moises Henriques was his first wicket.

Wayne Lawrence's avatar

Great article Gideon. I’ve always loved the name Bransby Beauchamp Cooper from cricket’s inaugural Test too…

Cricket et al's avatar

Buried in Geelong East Cemetery.

Jeff's avatar

And now Mahli Beardman