28 Comments
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Norm O'Bryan's avatar

Thank you once again, Gideon, for this powerful reminder of the fundamental things in life that we all, too often, take for granted until they are denied and their absence becomes both life and death defining.

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Paul's avatar

I don't know anything about my dad. Never met him. Don't know his name. I often pondered whether I would be better off knowing him. This piece went a long way towards resolving that question for me. Thank you Gideon.

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Gideon Haigh's avatar

That's hard, Paul. My sympathies.

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Damian OConnor's avatar

Powerful and deeply personal. Brave piece. Thanks for sharing.

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Tony Neilson's avatar

Beautiful writing again, Gideon. I’m glad we’ve got your talents for cricket, but a shame more won’t get to experience what you can do, because you’re “that cricket guy”. Thanks for sharing this piece today.

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Emilie Collyer's avatar

Such a beautiful and honest piece of writing. This is a weird day for many people for many reasons. Thank you for sharing yours.

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Lesley Smith's avatar

Overwhelming Gideon. My husband died on 16 th July. His birthday was last Sunday, and, of course, Father’s Day today. While he was physically present a lot of the time, emotionally he was on another planet all the time. I see him too as “The Father Who Didn’t “. He had a very confronting death over a ten week period, and yes, we were there for him. He decided there would be no funeral or memorial service, a decision which made things so much easier for me and our children.

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Gideon Haigh's avatar

That sounds very challenging, Lesley. Those birthdays of a lost loved one can be quite eerie. My condolences to you and your family.

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Tony Taylor's avatar

I wish I could express myself about myself like that. Hats off.

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MTC's avatar

Gideon, thank you for providing a counterpoint.

My history is not dissimilar all of which made me closer to my mother.

Not sure above forgiveness, more a case of nothingness.

I live in hope the current and future generation parents don’t replicate my parents’ generation parenting style.

I wish you a lovely day with your daughter, she is fortunate.

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Lou's avatar

Deeply moving piece of writing Gideon. Impactful and unsettling on many levels. A relationship beyond repair and due to infirmity beyond reproach.

A different path taken and lived.

Don’t know what else to say but thank you for sharing your life.

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Brett Moorgas's avatar

Thanks Gideon for sharing this. I too was brought up by a single mother. The story very different but I too seem to be shaped by someone I never knew and in my case never met. Reading your article brings some clarity of these things for me.

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Geoff Craig's avatar

Tough read Gid. Beautifully written. Thank you.

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Jan Gross's avatar

So moving I could barely read it & I won’t have the audacity to describe my own father

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Jan Gross's avatar

2 different experiences aren’t they - being a father & having one

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Gideon Haigh's avatar

I love being a father.

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Anthony James's avatar

Thanks Gideon. Me too. All the more for seeing how we can shift the currents we experienced. Both towards our kids, and in forgiveness of our fathers. There was often such harsh context to these stunted fathers - mine certainly, and his, I came to understand. And they're far from alone of course. So I celebrate the possibility of a healing culture of fatherhood today, counting our blessings.

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Jan Gross's avatar

I hope today gives you special pleasure 🙏📚

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Adrian Kelly's avatar

Beautiful

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paul ashbridge's avatar

Thank you so much for this very brave and heart rending piece Gideon

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Elizabeth O’Hare's avatar

Beautifully written GH. As always. Really he was the one who lost out really. You would be a son most people would order if they could.

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Alison Stock's avatar

Profoundly moving. Very thought provoking. Makes.me realise how lucky I am with my father. I am full of admiration of your obvious desire to be a true father to your daughter

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